SAD, don't you know it......

I apologize for not being an active blog participant recently, blogging friends and followers. It’s not that I don’t care about what is going on in your worlds; I do! Rest assured, I am keeping up with what's going on with you and I appreciate the comments you have made on my previous posts. The lack of daylight messes with me. My focus recently is, once I get home, getting into my pajamas and eating any carb that is within reach. You see, I suffer with SAD.

I never quite understood what happened to me during winter months. I would sleep away weekends and when I wasn’t sleeping I was eating. I did not want to socialize. I did not want to think. My Husband read an article about SAD 20 years ago, and based on that article I started making some changes to my usual routine that helped alleviate some of the symptoms. One of the biggest factors that contributes to sluggishness is lack of sunlight. It's dark when you get up and it's dark when you drive home. My office furniture is arranged so that I look out the window while I work at my computer, allowing me to soak up as much daylight as possible. My Husband bought me a blue light a few years back and I use it in the dead of winter when it's still dark outside in the morning, while I am blow drying my hair. I used to have it on while I was putting on my make up, but I found that the blue tinge it projected on my skin made for interesting make up application. :-) Taking vitamin D has helped a lot. But, without a doubt, once again riding has been the biggest help in keeping me well.

I didn’t realize the how much of a positive impact riding had on dealing with SAD until My Husband mentioned it. Two years ago, when I started my riding lessons, my personal test was if I could make it through a winter; if I could push myself to go to my two lessons a week (one evening, one early morning) when it was cold and dark and snowing, then riding was for me. My school horse, GM, was not very fond of me, or any student for that matter. She would have been a convenient excuse to cancel. But I didn’t. Even when I was injured and couldn’t ride, I still attended the lessons. Riding had drawn me in and I was addicted. I persevered through the winter months. I started to feel better and more energized as winter progressed. I still had some down days, but they were no longer the norm. After surviving that first winter, I started looking for my own horse.

Last winter was my first with Gem. Unless it was too cold, I held to the routine of riding him three times a week. Being outside with him, getting exercise, socializing and having FUN was good for body and soul; my winter was not so bleak. I do not see sleeping away another winter in my future. I am already getting adjusted to the recent time change and I know that I will feel better very soon. I am so glad that I found the best prescription ever for SAD - Gem!!

Hello Vodka Soda, It's Mommy Calling....

My last few rides have been so-so. Can't quite put my finger on it. I have had some successes but I feel like I am not quite getting it. In general, though, I feel a bit like I am letting Gem down. It's like he's waiting for me to do something. I can sense it. I have been working on some weak areas, but frankly they are making me weak! I have been experiencing jelly-legs lately when I dismount.

We are still having issues with the way he bends when going around corners. I feel like a failure in this area. He tends to turn his head to the outside just a smidge as we round corners, causing his neck and shoulders to bend inside. This has been an issue since day one. As we come up to a corner, I apply my inside leg to get him to bend around it. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. Sigh. I end up using my reins to reinforce my leg, which I am not too keen on.

I am still not able to ask him for a large posting trot. He will do one instead of a lope, but he will not do one if I am asking him to speed up from a jog. Our sitting jog is quick-ish already, so I guess he just thinks he's going fast enough. :-) I can apply leg pressure all I want, but he only speeds up a little teensy bit. I can almost see it in his eyes that he is routing for me to ask him correctly so he can respond. Come on, you can do it!! Sigh.

It's getting busier in the arena because of the change of temperature. It's hit and miss on keeping Gem's attention on me. I now keep him walking, even in lesson. I want him to realize that we are working and it's not about standing in the middle of the arena gabbing. Keeping him moving helps, but I feeling like I am pushing or pulling him all the time to keep him focused on the task at hand. If I give him one nano-second, his attention will move over to the other horses in the arena. I don't mind him being curious or friendly, but currently when he does this he disengages from me completely. I am trying not to take it personally. :-) Hopefully, the novelty of having new arena friends will wear off.

On a positive note getting on Gem has improved. Out of the last 3 times I got on him, he gave me the business once and it was minor. I changed the location of where I get on him and I think that made a bit of a difference. I also walk him around the arena a couple of times with whoa and back up thrown in a few times for good measure prior to taking him over the to mounting step-ladder. I believe this exercise sets the tone, so when I ask him to stand, he does.

I have been tired after the last few rides and looking forward to my vodka soda when I get home. My body has been in a constant state of sore the last week, a side-effect of working hard at trying to dial into the right number. Not Gem's fault, really. He's waiting for me to get it so he can answer and we can communicate. I hope I find the right number soon. I don't like feeling like I am letting him down.

What was I thinking....?