Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Fence War

I love my bed. I didn't realize how much I loved it until I returned from the hospital last week. My 1000 count sheets, feather pillows and feather comforter....nice cool breeze on my face.....birds chirping.....yep, I love my bed.

The first few days home, I was confined to bed. I had filled my pain medication prescription, but I only took it the first night so I could sleep. I haven't taken anything since. I know this is going to sound weird, but I actually like to know how much pain I am in so I know if I am recovering. Weird, eh? I can tell you that I am recovering nicely. :-)

I am not the type to lie in bed, but this time I had to; I could not get out of bed without the assistance of my husband. The first day home, I lay there dozing in and out of wonderful, blissful sleep. The second day I was a little more aware of what was going on around me. When you work all day, you have no idea what really goes on in your neighbourhood between 9:00-5:00 p.m. Having to lie in bed and actually "listen" to my neighbourhood was educational.

The highlight of my education was Pep and Lil, a male and female spaniel. They are gorgeous dogs. They are well cared for - their coats glisten. Unfortunately, Pep, the male, is not fixed. So, if my three dogs are outside, Pep has the need to show his dominance by hysterically barking at the fence, trying to inflict has much viciousness as he can through the 1 inch gaps between the boards. This is not new. The Fence War has been going on since my neighbours moved in 3 years ago. However, Lil recently joined the family and follows Pep's lead. We now have two hysterical adult dogs at the fence. My guys respond by puffing themselves at the fence and a barking/growling throw down ensues. It's awful.

My dogs are pretty good at responding to "enough!". Pep and Lil aren't. Well, actually I don't know because our neighbours never try to calm their dogs down. Although one or the other adult is home during the day, they are completely oblivious to the Fence War. On top of the barking, Lil has taken to gnawing and pulling on the fence boards (it's our fence, for cripes sakes!) in an attempt to tear down a board or make a hole big enough where her brother can come over into our yard and REALLY show everyone who's boss.

I didn't realize how bad the Fence War was until I had to stay in bed and listen to this madness every time my husband put our dogs out for a bio break. Good bye cool breeze on my face. Good bye birds singing. I feel bad for Pep and Lil. Their human parents should be taking more of an interest in their well-being and setting acceptable guidelines. Pep is just doing his job and his job never seems to be done. He has never been told when to quit and relax. My husband and I always take it upon ourselves to call our dogs in so that Pep calms down. It sucks, but because we don't want the whole neighbourhood to suffer with the noise, we do what's quick and easy. Yes, we are enabling our neighbour's inconsiderate behaviour.

My husband set up the patio furniture this past weekend so I could sit outside while I recover. I have been avoiding taking advantage of the nice weather because of having to leave my dogs inside. No longer! I will not be a prisoner in my own home! It's a sunny day today and I intend on sitting out on the deck with my dogs beside me. Yes, Pep and Lil will be going berserk and my fence will no doubt take a horrific beating. But I have every intention of winning this battle today. My strategy involves a lounge chair, music/earphones, book, daydreams of riding Gem, lots of patience and (several?) vodka soda.....

What was I thinking...?


  1. Glad you're home and recovering well so far!

  2. It's too bad when the neighborhood has to suffer barking out of control dogs because their parents won't discipline them. We have a barn across the street from us and they have a kennel full of barkers who bark from morning until late night EVERY day. It's really annoying, we can't wait until they leave for Florida every year and take the dogs with them. But then the morons on the other side let their kids ride snowmobiles all hours and really rev those engines up.

    Hope you're healing well and enjoyed your day out in the sun. Maybe you'll get a chance to see a neighbor out and jokingly refer to their dogs behavior and they'll get the hint.

  3. Thanks, Kate! Every day is better than the one before. :-)

    You know, GHM, these are not bad people, just disconnected. It frustrates me. I will be doing my best to keep from enabling them without putting their dogs at risk! BTW, I finished watching the Thorn Birds - cried and cried!

  4. Yay for recovery! Boo for bad neighbors (and crazy dogs-- I have a crazy dog and despite best efforts am probably a terrible dog owner too).
    Good luck with those vodkas. I will be envious while I sit behind my boring desk at my boring job (living my boring life).
    Continue to feel better wolfie!

  5. Now I feel deprived, my recuperation sheets were only 450 count!

    I have a ton of ideas for dealing with those rotten barkers! Most of them aren't that nice though. For instance: Sausages with mild sedatives hidden in them? Habanero pepper rubbed all over the fence? Getting a big box and dropping it over them so they can't see your dogs to bark?

    Yeah, this is why my husband says we can never have neighbors...

  6. Thanks, Rachel! My dogs are no where near perfect, that's for sure. :-) I have a suggestion for you regarding your baby. DAP: Dog Appeasing Pheromone. You can get in in spray, collar or plug in. It replicates the pheromone that lactating dogs produce to calm their puppies down. We used it when we got Charlie and it was a god-send at keeping everyone calm. It's natural, not a drug.

    Shannon - you crack me up!! You and I think alike (is that a good thing?). If I can't wear them down by just letting them tire out, my Plan B is using the hose. Every time they bark I will give the fence (not them!) a blast. Hopefully, this will break the hysterical thought pattern. They will probably be going in their house wet though - oops! ;-) Tabasco will be put on my fence if Lil doesn't stop chewing on it. :-) BTW, if you ever come across 1000 thread count, grab them! I swear you get a better sleep!