Blind to the Obvious

There is a man were I board that came to LA's place a few months before me.  Wade is about my age, was new to riding and a first time horse owner.  He basically inherited his horse, an Arabian, from his daughter who wanted to sell the horse so she could buy a car.  He bought the horse, she got her car.  Wade signed up for lessons with LA.

This horse looks very similar to Dar.

Dar is handsome, hot and fast....and unpredictable.  He requires an experienced rider.  That's not what Wade is.  In fact, after a few crazy incidents, LA told Wade that it would be better if he took some lessons on a school horse, so that he could concentrate on technique instead of trying to keep his horse under control during lesson.  That worked for a while.  Wade learned some stuff and "practiced" on Dar.  He eventually decided that he didn't need lessons and started riding by himself.  Dar's unpredictable behaviour never stopped Wade from riding; he never seemed concerned or worried.  Ignorance is bliss???

Even as a newbie rider, when Wade joined me in the front paddock when I first partnered up with Gem, I could see that he was in trouble.  Wade had no balance.  When he posted trot, he would fall forward on to Dar's neck.  When he loped, he bounced up and down hard in the saddle (we would all cringe watching him), his feet shoved all the way into the stirrups, toes pointed down.  Now, we have all been there.  In fact, I still have a hard time keeping my hands positioned and my butt in the saddle when I lope.  But, my balance has improved a great deal over the last couple of years.  Wade's not so much.  He still rides the exact same way.  LA has tried to give him pointers, to no avail.  Dar actually has regular chiro appointments for his back.  I would have thought that this might have been an indication that Wade's riding technique needed to change, but his take on the situation was to get a new saddle to correct the problem - it hasn't.

Going on trail rides with Wade/Dar is a challenge.  Wade doesn't see that his horse is a potential danger to himself and to others.  We are nervous to ride with him because he does not have control of Dar.  And, he has done nothing to correct the situation.  Dar has bucked, he has kicked at other horses and he has taken off on Wade.  Wade has cut trail rides short because he felt that Dar was becoming "bored" (aka uncontrollable) and that was why he's misbehaving.  Really, Wade?  He doesn't ride with us often - usually he rides in the morning - but when he does, my anxiety level increases.

Many times, Wade has readily admitted that he had to dismount Dar while riding out in the fields because Dar became unmanageable.  In Wade's mind, this is Dar's personality; he is how he is.  Dar threw Wade last Fall when they were out on the trails alone, breaking Wade's collar bone.  Fortunately, there was a boarder bringing her horse in from the fields and she came upon Wade and helped him back to the barn.  Wade now has a couple of screws holding his collar bone together.

This past winter, Wade decided that Dar was going to be an endurance horse.  Wade felt that as an Arabian, Dar would excel in this.  When no other riders would go out in the fields because of the conditions, Wade rode Dar in the snow to build muscle, with total disregard for Dar's safety (ice layers underneath the snow).  He bought boots for Dar and now rides him up and down the dirt road in front of LA's property.  This dirt road is actually a road connecting two main roads.  There are many homes on this dirt road.   Traffic isn't heavy, but it is regular.  Another boarder was driving to the barn the other day and saw Wade and Dar on the road.  She said watching the two of them terrified her; Wade did not look like he had complete control and she was waiting for Dar to take off as she slowly passed them.

Oh, I forgot to mention.  Wade DOESN'T WEAR A HELMET.

I bumped into Wade the other day and he was excitedly telling me of his first endurance race in June; a small regional competition.   As he was describing the event, all I could think of was how was Dar going to react to loping with a bunch of other competitors when he couldn't even go on a relaxed trail ride here without acting up.  I asked Wade if he had a safety vest.....no, but he thought he might have to as part of the mandatory riding equipment.  Whew.

In Wade's mind, Dar's bad behaviour is nothing more than him being bored because he's a performance horse.  How can bucking and taking off be accepted as the norm?  How can you let your horse buck you off and not take that as a wake up call?   How can you think it is acceptable to ride your horse on the road, risking the safety of rider/horse and those in vehicles, when you have admitted that he can be uncontrollable?  How can you think it is completely acceptable to ride this unmanageable horse, WITHOUT A HELMET?  Where is the common sense?  How can Wade not see that his relationship with Dar is an accident waiting to happen?  Is it stupidity?  Is it a case of ignorance is bliss?  Is it because Wade has no reference, i.e. he rarely rides with anyone so he doesn't see how it should be?

I have seen Wade's daughter ride Dar, when Wade was off due to his collar bone injury.  She's an experienced rider; Dar looked pretty good.   In my mind, Wade needs to step up and do what is right for Dar.  It can't be easy on Dar, having a rider that can't communicate properly and can't sit in the saddle.  I have to wonder if Dar's bad behaviour (because he knows he can get away with it) is exaggerated by this kind of frustration and lack of leadership.  Wade needs to have some lessons to learn how to be a safe rider and better leader, Dar needs to go to boot camp to reestablish manners and reacquaint him with how it should be and then the two of them need to train together.   IMHO.....  :-)  Sadly, I have no idea how this can come about when the rider is oblivious.

Hope you are having a good week!

 

Face to Face

Friday I met DH's Mom and we rode in the huge front paddock.  It was busy.  Lots of riders taking advantage of the nice weather.  It was a good ride.  I am trying to practice loping and Gem and I went around the paddock a couple of times.  My arse was up in the air on occasion and there were times where my hands/arms were flapping around.  I am hoping that practice will give me a more consistent seat. :-)  As I was untacking, LA asked me when we were going out on the trails.  She made some jokey comments about getting me wet in the swamp and how Gem was going to swim the pond.  I could feel anxiety starting in the pit of my stomach.  When we confirmed Sunday morning, she invited DH's Mom and another boarder to come along.  Now my anxiety really started to build.  It's one thing to work one-on-one with LA, but to have two others on the ride puts pressure on me to "perform".   I was starting to feel a little claustrophobic and sort of like the kid whose parent throws them in the water to teach them to swim.

Sunday arrived and I did my best to relax at the barn.  I didn't want Gem picking up on my nervousness.  My muscles were tense.  Vodka soda wasn't really an option at 10:00 in the morning, so I opted for 2 extra strength Advils instead.  :-)  DH's Mom knows of my mud anxiety and was kind and supportive as the four of us started out.  LA was leading with myself second and DH's Mom and the boarder bringing up the rear.  The chatter actually relaxed me quite a bit and as we walked through the muddy entrances to the different fields and the wet spots in the forest without incident, I was feeling better about the ride.  

We exited the forest on the swamp side.  OK, my heart rate started to increase.  I took a couple of deep breaths. The ground was still quite wet and spongy.  I gave Gem a bit more rein and let him lower his head to see where he was going.  Then we came to a very wet, squishy black mud patch.  He stepped into it and then "popped", as DH's Mom described it.  It was sort of a hop over the mud.  Now my heart was really racing.  But you know what?  He didn't go racing off like a lunatic as I had envisioned when I think of mud encounters.   And, my butt stayed in the saddle!  

While I was still trying to get my wits about me after Gem's pop, I watched LA, who was a little ahead of me, make a sharp left off the soggy path and start across the creek.  Wait a friggin second!!!  No one said anything about a creek!  I watched her cross, the water coming up to her horse's belly.  I froze.  DH's Mom went next.  Gem stood and watched his turnout buddy trot through, splashing water everywhere.   Now, where we were crossing the creek wasn't very wide; maybe 10 -12 feet.  But the banks were sort of steep.   LA was loudly encouraging me to come across.  I just stood there and it was on the tip of my tongue to tell her to go fly a kite.  Then she said something that was like a slap in the face.  She told me I needed to trust my horse.  I took a couple of deep breaths and then asked Gem to walk on.  He lowered his head, gauged the slope of the bank perfectly and we walked through the water and up the other side without issue.  Everyone clapped and yahoo'd.  LA reminded me that I could smile now, which and I did.  :-)  Gem got lots of "good boy" and scratches.  The boarder came across and we all stood and chatted for a minute.  

There is no trail on this side of the creek, so we had to go back the way we came.   I was to lead, so I turned Gem around and tried to get him to walk through.  He resisted and started to back up into the other horses.  My heart rate started to increase.  LA pointed out that my anxiety had me pull the reins up to my mid-section and when I applied pressure with my legs, I was asking him to back up.  Duh.  I took a deep breath, relaxed the reins and he walked forward and through the creek without issue.

LA's Australian Cattle Dog was with us on the ride.  He was in constant running mode the whole time we were out.  The energy this dog has is incredible.  As we left the creek and headed back into the forest, the dog bounded out from some shrubs and basically ran under Gem's head.  We were both caught off guard and we both spooked.  Gem did a couple of BIG side and front steps and I know I made some sort of noise.  But he calmed down immediately and I stayed in the saddle.

When we got to the loping field, I asked the others to wait while Gem and I walked by ourselves around the field.  Again, this is to help me with MY separation anxiety when out on the trails.  :-)  No problemo!  We continued on to the orchard side of the property and we all waded into the pond and stood for a few minutes, letting the horses drink.   The pond was a piece of cake after the creek.  :-)  

It didn't hit me until I started untacking.  I survived mud, a "pop", a creek, a spook, riding a small field solo and a pond.   I faced my fears and I stayed in the saddle.  :-)  Facing fears is always the hardest the first time.  I know it will get better each time I face them.  And, Gem was awesome the whole ride.  I heard LA talking to someone outside the barn.  I walked up to her, gave her a hug and thanked her.  She smiled and I returned to my awesome horse to finish untacking him....the perfect ending to my Sunday ride.

Have a good week everyone!